American Psycho

Recently I was reminded that Chloe Sevigny was in American Pyscho. If you haven't seen the movie then you simply must. I will say, however, that the book was much better.

There was a point in my life when I only worked 3 days a week. My total work week consisted of 12 hours of work. How I was able to do this is really no concern of yours except to know that I wasn't prostituting myself or selling illegal substances. I also lived with a roommate who had two small boys, ages 3 and 4. Remember this it is important later on. I was planning my wedding to The Fiance and told myself I needed the time off to do the planning. Mostly I just laid by the pool and spent a lot of time at Happy Hour.

The Bitch and I went to see American Psycho one fine afternoon when we had nothing better to do. (The Bitch and I have been friends for about a lifetime.) After the movie we went shopping and hit Happy Hour. My drink of choice used to be an El Presidente Margarita. Doesn't take many of those to get the stupid juices flowing. Once back at my house we felt the need to try on all of our purchases and see how ravishing we looked. Like two drunk girls look cute in anything being drunk at three in the afternoon.

In American Psycho there is a point where Christian Bale runs around in nothing but tennis shoes chasing a girl with a chainsaw. Well the boys owned a little play chainsaw. For some reason (obviously I was sloshed) in the middle of trying on clothes I thought it would be funny to chase The Bitch around the house with the play chainsaw. Now mind you I wasn't naked, but I was wearing only tennis shoes and some fine Victoria's Secret matching bra and panties. Don't ask why I still had the tennis shoes on. I've pondered it and I can't come up with a good reason.

So here I am running half naked through the house chasing The Bitch. She is alternating between screaming her head off and laughing so hard she might pee herself. Really, the shit people do when they are drunk. I guess we were being so loud we didn't hear the chime from the security system signaling someone had opened a door. As we rounded the corner coming out of the playroom, I saw them. My Fiance and his parents. I've never really figured out why they were at my house since I hate people dropping by unannounced. Needless to say, I'm pretty sure they thought they had walked into some sort of lesbian ritual. They are Southern Baptist. Having your precious baby boy marry a girl who runs through the house half naked chasing another girl is pretty much unacceptable.

The point here is not that there is something wrong with me. The point is if you are going to run around drunk re-enacting scenes from American Psycho you better lock the fucking front door.

Comments

[Mister Hand]

Now THAT'S funny!

But we're going to FIGHT over this: AMERICAN PSYCHO is a FAR better movie than it is a book. I hated that book. The movie actually had something to SAY.

I disagree. And that's all I have to say about it.

[SoW]

HHAHAHAHAHAHA! Brilliant! thank god there's a full grown adult (you) that is actually living as in living life!

[minijonb]

The book and movie of American Psycho are both brilliant... but not as brilliant as that story about the play chainsaw! Aces.

[Nobody Special]

I remember reading that novel, and seeing the film. Both were great. Have you read any other of Bret Easton Ellis' novels?